Another new year, another outrage in the office. I have held back from documenting every bit of ridiculousness I have witnessed over the course of the past six months, but today beckoned for an entry. Raptor swings by the aisle toward the end of the day to announce our reward of getting out a couple … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 13
The entire department gets dragged into a late morning meeting that Raptor assures us will only be 5-10 minutes. He walks over to our cubicles and announces that Eduardo and another individual with a Spanish first name I can’t recall are here from South America. I look up and ask him with little to no … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 12
I was sent down to the other main corporate office about 15 miles further south for three weeks to be the back-up for a manager who went to London and Italy for vacation. The hellish commute of an extra 30 miles round-trip goes unthanked by the Raptor upon my return. That is all right. Par … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 11
I'm back from a great vacation in Denver just in time to attend the company’s bi-annual employee town hall meeting/pep rally. Lucky me. I show up ten minutes late and walk in while one of the senior executives is giving his spiel. The CEO later gets on stage in a double-breasted suit worth at least … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 10
The first entry of the year? I’m astonished that it was that quiet and uneventful for four months in here. Or have I just become accustomed to the nonsense around me? The Raptor is preparing to leave for his vacation in Costa Rica and I mention how I would like to go for a week … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 9
I'm on a conference call with about a dozen people from North and South America when the project manager asks me for a status update for my group’s task. After I finish bringing everyone up to speed, the Raptor gets on the line and questions the one issue that I mention was being taken care … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 8
My cubicle neighbor and I make a bet that the snooty, loud millennial secretary two cubes down says "like" over 100 times in one workday. As in, "So, I was like 'I'm not ready yet' and she was like mad at me." I take the over and proceed to clock 24 "like's" in a five-minute … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 7
I’m surprised that there was no entry for the month of November. Shocked is the more appropriate word. Back from the nice Thanksgiving break and slammed with work. Raptor assaults me with hourly emails and, despite knowing how busy I am, manages to intentionally test my patience and knowledge over a petty task. He just … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 6
Happy Halloween! Coworkers dressed up in costumes, scary decorations, little trick-or-treaters from a nearby school walking through the office, my cubicle neighbor clipping his fingernails… Wait a second, excuse me? Yes. This has been a weekly occurrence for the past couple of months and despite calling him out on this inappropriate, unhygienic, and unprofessional conduct, … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 5
After a few uneventful weeks, the Raptor comes storming back during an impromptu staff meeting. He is in an unusually good mood and goes off on several different tangents. Apparently his wife is out of town―perhaps the reason for his cheerfulness―and he will be coming in later in the mornings on account of dog duties. … Continue reading A Day in the Life of a Corporate Desk Jockey: Episode 4
Seriology 